Enjoy my Friday’s Letters.
Dear S, It seems like we have reverted. I am not sure what has happened that you have been climbing in bed with me the past few days but it has got to stop. I barely get enough sleep as it is, and get even less when you are in bed with me. I need you to be a big boy and start sleeping by yourself all night again.
Dear B, Thank you for all the help you have given me in the last week. Without being able to get the extra sleep I don’t think I would have been able to function the little that I did.
Dear New Baby, Let’s agree that you want to come early and I will be seeing you in a few weeks. Not to early that you have to stay in the hospital longer than the standard 36 hours, but not longer than necessary. You will be happier out here because you will have more room and I will be happier because I do not have all these pains anymore. Wanna make this deal? I guess I will find out as the time comes.
Dear Target, I only went to see you yesterday to get a food scale so I can weigh packages before I mail them and came home with a lot more. Really I don’t think I needed that trash can or swing, but could not pass them up, especially with B telling me to buy them.
Dear Boxspring, Why does it make such a difference if you are on the bed or not? When we put you on the bed, I am so uncomfortable that I cannot get any sleep. We take you off the bed and I sleep like a baby. It is amazing. B cannot tell the difference, but let me tell you I can. Would it normally make a difference for me? No, but with this stomach it makes all the difference in the world.
Dear new Smart TV, I am not sure I am going to like you. When I watch you it actually hurts my eyes. Is this normal? Are we going to find out in like 5 years that these TV’s cause you to go blind? Maybe I will get used to you, but right now you just give me a headache.